Waiting it out

I always knew the last few weeks of my recovery would be the worst.
Lately, life has been throwing me some curve balls. Just when I think I've got a good bead on things, I discover I'm clueless.

It's a power-hard trip to stay one step ahead.  I'm not asking the right questions, at the right time.

When life becomes a confusing ball of headgames, i would, typically, jump on my bike until i was just too weary to worry about it anymore. Plus, the rush of adorphins took care of my worries.  The problems still existed, but my coping methods were in place and working.

Now, being alone and dealing with the recovery, it's hard to keep my eye on the big picture.

The only activity I'm allowed to do, is walk.  I even bought the VIbrams to help strengthen my legs.  6 miles of walking, proved to be too much for my still recovering abdomen. I am definitely paying for it now.

I've never been really good at expressing my frustrations or confusions.  I beg that others will cut me some slack, but in a world of WYSIWYG, i blurt out incoherent thoughts and think later, "what the hell did i mean by that".  then i just give up.

To be honest, this weather isn't helping. really? The most beautiful spring we've ever had, and im grounded like a bird w/ a bum wing.  I can sing all i want, but the song is despair that i can't fly with my fellow foul.

It will help to be around my birds of a feather tomorrow.  They always cheer me up.  But i need to get back on that bike....However, to my close friends whom have been bearing the brunt of my mental state, please forgive me.  Supergirl is only a few weeks away...

Oh yeah, my Ragbrai charged my credit card. I wonder if that means i'm going??

Clear Skies and Clear Thoughts.
Time to disappear into my books.