Thursday, April 7, 2011

Progress and Two Steps back

Not to complain, but it always seems that when I finally make progress in something I'm attempting to do, I run into a setback.

For about three weeks, work has been in overtime, and I've been gradually feeling something wrong.  I ignored it, of course, take advil and move forward.  But in reality, I've not had much down time, nor sleep in a while.

This past weekend, after I did the Tour of Dallas, a stressful couple of days, and a resulting headache. But i knew immediately what it was. The same headpain i'd suffered last last year.  I was able to get to the doc monday in the afternoon. Bad news, the growth is back in my eye.

What is even more distressful, is that i get nothing from the doc's on what is causing it. "just happens" and despite my internet research, i'm finding the same conclusion. IF i knew of a better doc in the dallas area, I would go.

You can't imagine how irritating this is.  It feels like gravel in my eye, and the headache is like a stabbing pain through it.  My vision is blurry again.  THis time, they've put me on eye drops, hoping it will help. I did everything they told me to, and I even cleaned up my nutrition to help the process.  But it's back.

I went out Tuesday to ride, because I knew, with the wind, it could be my last ride before the surgery.  I did two laps, and despite the wind, did ok.  BUt the headache came back a little worse. Ok i paid for that. damnit.

Monday, i go back to see if the drops are helping, and if i have the surgery or not.   Then im back to 3-4 months of back in the woods again, hoping it doesn't come back. 

I'm having a hard time with it this time, because now that it has come back, what am i to do about the future? Am i to face this over and over?

Keep me eyeball in your thoughts!

Clear, calm skies.

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